Full Circle

For anyone reading this blog, you'll notice a common thread in maintenance.... it's TOUGH! Reaching my goal weight of 150 has been difficult. I've floundered. I've negotiated. I've "started again" numerous times. I can only thank God that I have at least managed to maintain the majority of my weight loss. But it's not enough. Not for me. I yearn to be at a weight were I'm no longer classified as overweight or worse - obese. 

So I've decided to give myself over to a power stronger than my will. I'm going back to the beginning where things made sense, I had support, and surrounded by others who are going through the same struggle so I've decided to go back in to Phase 1 as a new "HMR Alum". The group knows that I've "been there and done that" but that I'm not done with my journey. I have unfinished business and lessons still to learn.

So here I am. I feel good about my decision. I'm thankful for this program and the people. 

Decision-free is just what I need to get me through the holidays, to finally reach my goal, and be better able to handle maintenance in the New Year.

I won't ask you to wish me luck this time... just pray for me.

Happy New Year!

It's been a while and now that 2011 is here it's time to take things back to basics. The last few months have been.... let's say... educational. I learned that:
a) I'm not ready to be in maintenance.
b) I need a better plan when I DO go back to maintenance.
c) I need to stick w/ my original coach

I love telling stories, so let me back up.
In my last post, I was going into maintenance. I did that but made a critical error. I switched coaches. The new coach was very nice and sweet. She did not come down on me if I gained a pound here or there. We blamed it on my monthly TOM. Some of it was the normal process of going back to "normal food". But I needed a Jillian --- or better yet, I needed my old coach back! She would have sat me down after the first 5 lbs and held me accountable.

Then came the dreaded holidays. They weren't horrible...I enjoyed, but I also worked out and had lots of veggies and shakes. I did however enjoy too much cheese and bread. I tried to compensate for my cheese habit by increasing my running miles. BAD IDEA! I ended up straining my left hip and that left me unable to do any exercise for 3 weeks!

So the week after Xmas, I was back in the clinic having a heartfelt conversation w/ my now ex-ex-coach. She told me she was proud that I recognized that I've gotten off track and I was seeking help. She helped me refocus and get back to basics.

Shakes. Veggies. Water. 60 mins on my bike. Journal my food.

AHHH I'm back in my box! Yeah! I feel in control! Yes! And my reward for a week is 6 lbs gone.

So my current weight is 175. Yes, I gained 16lbs between Nov and Dec. It's not hard to do!

But I'm back on track. I have not been derailed - just side tracked.

I'm mentally OFF maintenance and back in Phase 1. I'm excited. I hit a huge plateau in July and I think my little bump in weight will be the thing I needed to push through and hit my goal this year. My hip is pain free and it's cold has heck outside so I'll be sticking to the bike for at least a month until the weather warms up.

So for any of you starting 2011 with a weightloss goal, GOOD LUCK! We call can do this. Remember...
Nothing tastes as good as healthy feels!!!

Week 32 Weigh In

Week 32 was not the best week. The scales at the clinic showed another 1 lb weight gain.
So right now I'm gaining and losing the same 5lbs. :-(

I have 20 lbs to go before I get to my goal weight and it is going to be a battle of wills.

I spoke w/ my health educator about it and we decided that it would be good at this time to take a step backwards and go back to just shakes and veggies for now. Our current theory is that the MR's are too loaded down w/ carbs (pasta and rice) which is throwing my weight loss off. I have to admit that I feel relieved to be doing something about my plateau. I feel much better after my meals - more energetic, less lethargic... This is a good lesson to learn for maintenance. Pastas, rice and high carb foods cannot be daily items on my plan.

By the weekend, I was showing a 3 lb drop on the scale - very exciting! Then I ran my 5k on Sunday and did a 4mile run/walk yesterday and the scales are up 2lbs. :-(

I know it is just temporary due to all my PA. But I really want to see a good number this week so today and tomorrow I will be 100% shaking. Hopefully that will prompt my body to release the water weight.

I will blog about the race itself later. To sum it up, it was awesome and I will definitely do more of them!

Week 28 Weigh In

Well after a week on Healthy Solutions, I am up a pound. :(
TOM is back. The scale showed 165 the other day and by the next morning, I was up again. I am hoping this is temporary. I am tired of the 160's and ready to move down!

My younger son is turning 7 on Saturday. The family is planning to come down to celebrate. It should be a fun day at Soak City. Sunday we will do a BBQ/Cake/Ice Cream. I am planning hamburgers and hotdogs. Those are not as tempting and I'll be able to grill up a veggie burger for me.

Week 27 Weigh In

After a week of sweaty high intensity workouts, I weighed in last night and lost 4 lbs! I am starting to feel like I am getting my groove back. The loss brings me back to my low of 168 lbs. I have set a goal of 3 lbs for this coming week. I am transitioning to Healthy Solutions which is a minimum of 3 shakes, 2 MRs, 5 servings of veggie/fruit. I'm thrilled that my box has grown to include all veggies, fruits and legumes! The goal is to have at least 1200 calories per day. I will need to keep my PA levels high but that is no problem.

My left hip-flexor has been stiff - I believe from over training, not stretching out enough after my runs. So I have started doing infrared wraps to loosen them up. The heat works wonders and has really helped my side. The nice side effect is that I sweat a lot! It also softens the hard to burn fat and makes it more susceptible to be burned off with normal exercise. We will see. For now, I'm loving the results!

Week 26 Weigh In

As expected, the scales at the clinic were not so nice this evening. Minutes after a 5.9 earthquake, I weighed in a pound heavier. I argued that the earthquake shook up the scales but Noel would not hear it! He has thrown down the challenge... lose 3.5 lbs this week!

I am up for the challenge.

Week 25 Weigh In and Beyond

This is a horribly late post. So late in fact that I'm supposed to go to my Week 26 Weigh In tonight! Life has been crazy the last two weeks. My family moved to a new house and downsized so we had to sort/pack/get rid of stuff before the move. We are more or less settled in to the new place but my weight loss has leveled off. I'm hoping this will be the week to get back on track. I was not able to run or do my regular PA all last week but I stayed active moving, lifting, packing. That should count for something!

So today I weighed in at 168. Two lbs in two weeks. I'll take it! Hopefully the scales at the clinic are just as nice. It really sucks to weigh in after eating/drinking all day long....

Okay so here is the latest news since my last posting...

1. My transition plan is in place. I have one more week to go on the regular plan before I switch to Healthy Solutions. The regular plan consisted of 5 shakes minimum plus I could include MR's and veggies as needed. The Healthy Solutions plan requires 3 shakes, 2 MR's and 5 servings of fruits/veggies per day. This will boost my calorie intake from 1000 calories per day to 1200 calories. This is the minimum caloric intake for a non-medically supervised plan. Due to my diabetes, I will continue to be medically supervised until I transition to Phase 2 (maintenance). I stay on Healthy Solutions for 4 weeks and transition to Phase 2 after August 15th. Why Aug 15th, you may ask??.... Well that is a great segue to my next bit of news...

2. I signed up for my first 5k!!! The AFC (America's Finest City) 1/2 Marathon and 5k is to take place on Sunday August 15th in Balboa Park. I'm so excited! This event has put me in the "in training" mentality and I have been using that to really boost my running. My goal for the 5k is to run the whole thing in 30 minutes or less. While the moving threw a kink in my training schedule, I did manage to start running again on Sunday. My time there was 3.2k in 29.5 mins! I was thrilled! I was worried that a few days away from my running shoes would cause me to slip backward but in fact the rest period helped me get over my left hip strain.

Overall, I'm a bit bummed that my weight loss has slowed down but I will gladly take that if it means that I'm building the body that I want long term. I keep telling myself that I'm swapping fat for muscle. I must be - my waist and clothes continue to shrink despite the fact that my momentum has decreased. Regardless, my goal for the next 5 weeks is to get as close to 150 as I can then shed the rest of it in Phase 2.

Week 24 Weigh In

After a horrible week w/ my TOM, I'm finally starting to feel myself. Jumping on the scale today showed me down 3 lbs bringing my total weight loss to 70lbs!!! What a relief to finally hit this goal! There is officially 20 lbs to go!

Looking back at this month, I would say that my momentum has slowed. I'm going to use this next week to get back to basics. Shakes, cereal, MR's, muffins, water. I will minimize my veggie intake to no more than 2 servings per day.

I believe my veggie eating is leading to more out of the box eating which is adding hidden calories. This is okay for maintenance, but not for weight loss!

I feel confident in my exercise plan. I've been alternating running, walking and biking. I would like to take up yoga to help with my flexibility but that will have to wait until life settles down. I was talking with my oldest son yesterday during our 4 mile walk and mentioned that I would like to eventually do a triathlon in 3 years. I think that's a pretty good long term goal.

While I have not lost a lot of weight this month, I have noticed I'm still shrinking. My waist is 33 inches now and my thighs are a bit smaller. My upper body is pretty slender. My arms, face, chest are lean and there is the beginnings of a six-pack showing. I believe the running is replacing my fat with muscle; I'm not complaining. :-D

Week 23 Weigh In

This week's weigh in showed no weight loss. I'm disappointed but not surprised. While my running has definitely increased to the next level, my eating has also been less controlled than earlier weeks.

I believe I know where I need to make some adjustments.

1. Less bars! While these are handy on the plane and travelling, the calories add up quickly over the course of a week. I need to go back to treating these as emergency rations.

2. Eat more earlier. I've been so busy lately that my midmorning snacks turn into lunch and I end up with 3 shakes I need to drink at the end of the day. This is doing two things wrong: loading up on calories at the end of the day and unnecessarily over stuffing myself at night. I already know night time overeating is my bad habit. So more shakes during the day - even if that means doubling up in the morning.

3. Measure veggies. I have not been very good about actually measuring what I'm eating. I need to start doing that!!

4. No more OTB eating! I need to buckle down and get these last 20 lbs off before I start opening my box up to other foods.

Now that all my travel is over, I need to stuff myself back in my box and back into my routine and hope next week will show some progress.

Week 21 Weigh In

My weigh in last night showed me down 1/2 lb. Not much but I will take anything that gets me closer to my 150 goal. My PA over the weekend was pretty high so I expect next week's numbers to show the results of all my hard work.

I am still hoping to get below 170 by next Wednesday. Hubby is joining me in Chicago next Thursday and we're planning a long Anniversary weekend exploring the Windy City. It should be fun and I'm looking forward to it!

Week 20 Weigh In

You may be asking... what happened to Week 19's Weigh In? I was travelling! So no weigh in for that week. :)

Anyway, it was good to be back in the clinic Wednesday. I was there early and got to spend some time w/ Noel (the nurse) and caught up with the staff and doctors. My weigh-in shows be down 3 lbs bringing my total weight loss to 68 lbs.

With Memorial Day weekend coming up, it should be a busy and active weekend. I would really like to get into the 160's by June!

Week 18 Weigh In

Last night's weigh in shows me down another 3 lbs bringing my total weight loss to 65 lbs. At my current weight of 175, I am 25 lbs away from my goal!!!

Last night,. my diet buddy and I officially went to the veggie plan which adds a limited selection of vegetables into my box. I was thrilled! Afterwards, I stocked up on the yummy goodness at the grocery store and went home to make something "asian".

I took 1 1/2 cup stir fry veggie mix and cooked them up in a pan using olive oil Pam, some grated ginger, and a squeeze of lemon. I mixed that with my Savory Chicken MR which contained wild rice, chicken breast and a smattering of mushrooms. Combined, it turned into a great tasting chicken bowl for 250 calories. Woooohoo!

I plan to bask in veggies veggies veggies.

Sunday I fly out for a week long business trip. I feel more confident that I will be able to stay in my box this trip, and run everyday.

Wish me luck!

Week 15 Weigh In

My TOM has hit this week so I was not expecting a big loss but I was happy to see a 3 lb drop! This brings my total weight loss to 57 lbs. This confirms to me that my plateau has come and gone. My new meal plan is very satisfying and has re-ignited me to stay in Phase 2 until I hit my goal weight.

My official weigh in is tonight - I hope the scales there are just as nice. :-)

Update - the scales last night were very nice! I'm 3 lbs away from getting below 30 BMI and no longer classified as "obese". I can't wait!

Week 14 Weigh In

I weighed in this week at 186 which is a total weight loss of 54 lbs. I am so relieved! Thankfully my plateau was short lived and I am back on track. Last night to commemorate my 50lb loss, the nurse took my picture and remeasured my waist and hips.

I have lost 10 inches from my waist (49 > 39)and 5 inches from my hips. YAHOOOOEY!

I have also been moved over to use the HMR 500 shakes. They are only 100 calories per serving vs 160 in the 800's. That effectively cuts 360 calories a day from my shake consumption. I have drinking my first one this morning and I can equate it to the difference between whole milk and low fat milk. It tastes the same but is not as creamy.

My hope is that the shift to the 500's will give me the nutrition I need and allow me to start incorporating more meal replacements into my diet. I need to move off a full liquid diet and I see this as the first step in that transition.

I also spoke with my health educator last night. She has encouraged me to keep up the 6 shakes per day if that seems to be working for me. She also does not want me to back down from running or any of my other PA for fear of not losing weight. She has continued to reassure me that my plateau was due to me retaining water due to all my PA not a true stagnation of weight loss.

I will resume my PA. Tentatively my workout plan is as follows:

Thurs: Run / Walk
Friday: Bike / Ab X
Saturday: Walk 4 miles at beach
Sunday: Run / Walk
Monday: Bike / Ab X
Tuesday: Run / Walk
Wednesday: Walk or Bike

Week 13 Weigh In

I have decided to re-write my weigh in since my last post was a bit pre-mature. I weighed in last night and showed no weight loss. I was pretty shocked. This has been a very active week for running, walking, biking. I'm doing something every day. The nurse and doctor reassured me that this is normal. To me it does not make sense.

I sat in class listening to Michelle (my health educator) talk about "More is Better". The concept is, if you're hungry, eat more in-the-box foods. They are low cal, good for you etc, you will not gain weight. The longer I sat through the discussion the more frustrated I became so I decided to talk with her after class.

Michelle looked through my food and exercise log and believes that with my increased PA, my body is holding on to some water. My TOM is also coming due which would not only contribute to the increased hunger I was having a few days ago but also some water retention. Lastly, since I ran out of cereal which I normally eat for dinner, I have been eating MR's and skipping the last shake. Since I get all my nutrition from the shakes, my body is likely irritated that it was deprived some nutrients.

So the goal for this week is: add an extra shake everyday this week to give my body the nutrients to recover from my PA and meal skipping. Hopefully my TOM will come and go. Keep up with my PA since I'm enjoying it so much.

I felt better after that conversation and plan to do as she says. Tonight, I'm going to ride my bike then soak in the jacuzzi to work out the sore kinks from my last run. I would like to run tomorrow and start Week 2 of the Couch 2 5k program. My sister has started week 2 and I need to keep up with her! :-D

Wish me luck and weight loss!

Week 12 Weigh In

I am down 5 lbs this week to 189! That brings my total weight loss to 51 lbs. Changing up my PA and adding the running is paying off! I am feeling great. The soreness I experienced last weigh in is gone. I have started the Couch 2 5k program which is a 9 week training schedule. I have given myself permission to repeat weeks as necessary to avoid injury or over doing it.

Tonight is my first night in Phase 2. Half of my original group will be joining this class so I won't feel like the new kid on the block again. I'm looking forward to meeting some new people and hearing their story.

I was just coming off the high of being under 200 lbs. Now I can say "So long!" to the 190's.

Week 11 Weigh In

The scale shows me down another 2 lbs today bringing my total weight loss to 46 lbs. I have started running this week and I'm sore but feeling great.

Running has given me some time to reflect on my journey so far. I feel something changing inside. A rightness to everything. Four months ago, I was feeling older than my age and I didn't know how to turn it around. Today I feel young and vital. I feel comfortable in my own skin and that soothes my soul. Perhaps it's the endorphins but I feel good. Most importantly, I feel healthy and strong. The fog is lifting and I see a long life ahead of me.

Week 10 Weigh In

Despite my TOM, I managed to drop 2 lbs this week bringing me down to 196 which is 44lbs lost. I'm really starting to notice changes in my body. When you're overweight, all of these things are hidden and you get used to seeing a rounder you. Now I'm seeing edges... and it's cool. I see definition in my legs, cheekbones,  my double chin is gone. I can see a bit of my ribs, my arm and leg bones, my sternum. I'm looking forward to getting to know myself all over again!

Week 9 Weigh In

I got on the scales this morning at 5:30 and had to wake my hubby up to witness the scale read 198.4! Total weight lost is 42lbs. This is the first time since my teen was a BABY that I've been under 200 lbs! I'm rejoicing today in ONEDERLAND!

I have my official weigh in at the clinic tonight, but those numbers will pale compared to what I saw this morning. I'm so happy words can't describe it.

Needless to say, the scale motivated me to put on my workout clothes and do an hour this morning before my day gets busy. I won't have time later. I've been wearing the HRM the last 3 workouts and will post separately on that later.

My next goal is to hit 180 and I believe more than ever that I can do it.

Happy Monday

I know it's early but I couldn't help but jump on the scales today and was happy to see a 2.5 lb drop which brings my overall weight loss to 38lbs. I'm 3 lbs from 199 and it's like watching water boil!

My Polar watch came in this weekend and I have calibrated it. I will work out for the first time with it this afternoon and will update my post. I'm really hopeful this HRM will be the boost I need to get my PA where it needs to be to keep my momentum going. Now that I'm ~40lbs lighter, I realize I will have to work harder to lose each pound!